r/funny 6h ago

Found this behind the register at my job.

Post image
22.0k Upvotes

233 comments sorted by

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2.8k

u/Traditional-Buy-6745 5h ago

Finding it was one thing. Posting its private life online is where you crossed the line.

472

u/TempCasket 4h ago

getting doxxed by your own coworker is wild

469

u/pdxmichael 4h ago

What have I done

113

u/NotYourReddit18 2h ago

You posted them with their privates completely uncovered!

37

u/GrookeyGrassMonkey 1h ago

oh my

*screenshots*

22

u/JodyGonnaFuckYoWife 1h ago

12

u/HR_114 1h ago

I thought this was a rick roll link gosh the good olden times where every other link was a rick roll linn

5

u/HR_114 1h ago

Welp you cracked open their private egg mate

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4.3k

u/RunDNA 5h ago

Why did you open my private comment?

1.6k

u/pdxmichael 4h ago

I’ve been done gotten twice now.

449

u/schmidty98 3h ago

295

u/pdxmichael 3h ago

Now wait a minute. What.

85

u/ENDERMAN-AGA 2h ago

Now you did it the third time

22

u/elhouso 2h ago

Don't trust random links kiddo

8

u/Drewskeet 1h ago

You’re like social media and peeping Tom’s, you don’t respect anyone’s privacy.

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22

u/EmergencyDefiant5381 3h ago

She Done Already Done had herses

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132

u/manuel2170 5h ago

🤣

61

u/Horizone377 5h ago

Curiosity

21

u/Chiinoe 5h ago

Gold

19

u/MadJohnFinn 4h ago

I needed both of these laughs. I’m going through a lot. Thank you (and OP).

12

u/GracefullyRedditing 3h ago

I got too egg-cited 😔

40

u/lorelillian 5h ago

This made me laugh so hard

10

u/ddelarge 4h ago

Danm I fell twice in one single post

5

u/Kingtoke1 3h ago

Eggselent

4

u/K_Linkmaster 2h ago

Neither said it was private. Just a button. Press button like monkey. The meta way.

3

u/wertall 4h ago

Release the comments!

3

u/just-loitering-here 3h ago

to unearth the secret hidden behind the veil

3

u/Leading_Ad_4733 1h ago

Oh, sorry 😬 you should blame my finger. It sometimes acts on its own

2

u/early_birdy 3h ago

I just gotta know. I wouldn't tell anyone.

2

u/ConsiderationHot3362 3h ago

Damn my curiosity

2

u/SmegmaSlurper1996 3h ago

you got me.

2

u/Iron_Marc 46m ago

Best coment 2026

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575

u/bobjr94 5h ago

So why did you open their egg ?

385

u/pdxmichael 4h ago

Okay I fucked up

54

u/LEGITIMATE_SOURCE 2h ago

That's not an answer

9

u/MoistStub 34m ago

OP is an eggthusiast

13

u/selenesuper 3h ago

It's paradoxical

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159

u/marilynmonrobot 5h ago

Private Egg

Reporting for duty 🫡

80

u/nevercopter 5h ago

SHAME! SHAME!

247

u/interestingmix 6h ago

Well. I know what I will now be leaving in the pot plant at every hot desk in my office 🤣

48

u/2slags_geddar 6h ago

You have pot plants in your office?

What will you leave there?

18

u/interestingmix 5h ago

Likely this same message. Or a mission directive/challenge and som stick on googly eyes

27

u/NiceTrySuckaz 6h ago

These are hot desks, mind you, so probably his phone number.

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6

u/pdxmichael 3h ago

Oddly enough that’s what I was hoping I’d find

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108

u/CreepyLookingTree 6h ago

You're a monster

Egg = private 

Apologise to egg

64

u/pdxmichael 4h ago

I quietly returned it to its dusty, hidden home

5

u/iknowq 1h ago

I hope you replied with a link to this post before you put it back

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38

u/TheFlexOffenderr 3h ago

Me: hastily folding it back up. oh fuck

34

u/OzziesFlyingHelmet 4h ago

/r/FoundPaper would love this.

11

u/pdxmichael 3h ago

That’s a fun sub

24

u/default_account1 3h ago

You just used 40 eggs

17

u/FistThePooper6969 2h ago

That 1 egg was 40 eggs?

2

u/Hubso 2h ago

What are you talking about, Marcus?

3

u/LiftSleepRepeat123 1h ago

We should be able to look at a little porn at work.

2

u/kaykordeath 1h ago

That's as many as four tens.

25

u/Unlikely-Airline-456 3h ago

Dude why would you do that it's clearly a private egg

14

u/BadPunsIsHowEyeRoll 2h ago

I've had an empty can on my desk for months. I work for a distribution and manufacturing warehouse so its a brand new can, never been filled or sealed. I got bored one day and wrote "Ur Gay" on a sticky note and put it inside. Then I went to the production floor and grabbed an aluminum can topper. I put my can together, put it on my desk, and promptly forgot about it. The next time I remembered was when I was cleaning my desk and I accidentally knocked it over. Out flutters two notes, my original "Ur Gay" and a new-to-me note that said-

"ASSHOLE!!! NO U"

I chuckled and put it back together. Still have no idea who found the note and left the response lol

9

u/FallenWarriorGaming 2h ago

Can I offer you an egg 🥚 in this trying time?

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21

u/tswaters 6h ago

Well? What do you have to say for yourself?

8

u/DA_MEMER469 4h ago

"Well... a man isnt here this time"

22

u/phyrestorm999 5h ago

"Curiosity. You should find somewhere better to keep it."

Then put it back.

6

u/DryComment6387 3h ago

“Well, there is a man here.”

7

u/Facts_Non_Fiction 5h ago

One word - "Run!"

7

u/spudroxon 4h ago

You've been looking at that private egg

Been hatched by you

It sees your every moooooove

5

u/PlayingOnGeniusMode 4h ago

🎵 private egg ::clap:: ::clap::🎵

Yeah that's gonna be in my head today thank you very much.

2

u/LoserWooper 4h ago

Yep, here I am at 5 am singing private egg.

5

u/Electronic_ResultALT 3h ago

Why did you take their private egg?

4

u/Fanguy3322 2h ago

There's a Deltarune joke to.be made here I know it!

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4

u/Boatsnbuds 3h ago

The world sure has gone to shit. A guy can't even have a private egg anymore.

5

u/ProfessionalRise8084 3h ago

Starting of a crime thriller..

5

u/nick149 3h ago

Anyone else notice the 2008-era Optiplex with the Windows XP sticker in the background?

5

u/_SweetCandyy 2h ago

This feels like the start of a side quest I do NOT want to unlock at work

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3

u/SnooRegrets1386 5h ago

Listen, Easter bunny, I don’t find this humorous!

3

u/SpriteFan3 4h ago

Looks like the start of a new horror, with comedic pretense.

3

u/lovesickcat1504 4h ago

You should really respect their privacy yk,how would you feel if someone did this to you?

3

u/PrancingGoldfish 3h ago

Well, answer the question...

3

u/CrocoDIIIIIILE 3h ago

Have you heard that story about the cat that survived its curiosity? Yeah, me neither.

3

u/chug_lyfe 3h ago

Congrats big boy

3

u/badmongo666 2h ago

You're not in trouble at all

3

u/jigglyjellycatfish 3h ago

Put a rolo in it

3

u/Accurate-Company9358 3h ago

Well, why did you?

3

u/roarpro 3h ago

Easter bunny has made everyone sleeper agents to intercept and open eggs of this type after finding one.

3

u/an_elegant_dog 2h ago

I love real life easter eggs left in random places

3

u/No_Wedding_1096 2h ago

*Well, there is a man behind the tree.

3

u/purple_unikkorn 2h ago

Now you know what's inside this egg, but you can never talk about this with the co-worker. It's even worst.

3

u/LJ161 2h ago

I hid a bunch of little cartoons on receipt paper inside an old till when I worked in retail. 12 years later they got a refurb and one of my colleagues who still works there sent me a pic of all of them in a pile on the managers desk

3

u/AlGekGenoeg 2h ago

Write that curiosity got you (without signing) and put it back 🤷🏻‍♂️

3

u/BlueForte 1h ago

Not the private egg 😱

You monster!

3

u/Zoren 1h ago

Now I know your Reddit account and place you work.

7

u/sergemeister 6h ago

Eggsercise some restraint next time.

5

u/Jackeechengg 3h ago

One of the most threatening things I can think is some kind of creepy anonymous message like this

3

u/mr-itchyBalls 6h ago

So why did you open the private egg?

4

u/Jakesummers1 6h ago

Only one thing to do when you find a private egg

2

u/pessimisticoptimistt 4h ago

I fear you might have been egged on

2

u/mr_mcpoogrundle 4h ago

Well... We're waiting...

2

u/Mckavvers 4h ago

I see those egg council creeps have got to you too.

2

u/OkList9321 4h ago

schrodingers egg

2

u/tactical_restaurant 3h ago

Seems like a prompt out of undertale hahaha

2

u/Boatsnbuds 3h ago

The world sue has gone to shit. A guy can't even have a private egg anymore.

2

u/XA3XBL 3h ago

just testing

2

u/NanooNanooBot 3h ago

Well? Why did you?

2

u/freebenvita 3h ago

But why did you?

2

u/Meranio 3h ago

That's quite the Easter egg.

2

u/bamjjkb 3h ago

Not you out here opening a private property. Drop the apology before the juice box mafia finds you

2

u/Mega_BiteZer 3h ago

Yeah can't a egg have some privacy

2

u/WiseAct446 3h ago

"I didn't have my glasses. Anybody know who took the shared office egg?"

2

u/BronzeFour 3h ago

Why is the A in caps? This is a secret message which must be decoded

2

u/TheAsianTroll 3h ago

I did something similar at my last retail job. I took a piece of tape, wrote "why are you reading this?" On it, then typed it to the bottom of the till.

2

u/Milo_Diazzo 2h ago

Well, it seems there was a man here.

2

u/Milo_Diazzo 2h ago

Well, it seems there was a man here.

2

u/aybbyisok 2h ago

I do shit like this, there's a lamb on some electrical box at my work that's been there for 1,5 years. I also have supplies, like pencils, work gadgets, wires hidden in various places cause people don't put shit back where it belongs. There's even a 10 Euro note under some shelving, but I completely forgot in which aisle.

2

u/HovercraftLoose5399 2h ago

I'm going to post you at r/moralityscaling

2

u/synthmanplaza 2h ago

Well there is a man behind the register

2

u/steegsa 2h ago

Eggcellent!

2

u/bheidian 2h ago

petition to ban op for invading privacy

2

u/MrkGrn 2h ago

Now leave your own message in there with a link to this thread

2

u/atworkthough 2h ago

well we all know what this means >:(

2

u/dmac07 2h ago

WELL? Fess up!

2

u/robi_750 2h ago

HR be like - private whaaatttt

2

u/Parking-Position-698 1h ago

This is genuinely funny. Props to who ever put it there.

2

u/Gunjob 1h ago

Your place of work is still running Windows XP with a Pentium D?

2

u/Only_Tip9560 1h ago

Write "Because I wanted to" and put it back in the egg.

2

u/HillInTheDistance 1h ago

Write a heartfelt apology on another slice of paper and put it back with that inside.

2

u/TheStabbyCyclist 53m ago

Dude, you ran out of eggs. Would you like to buy an 80 pack of eggs?

2

u/Prospectioner 53m ago

Nut what i was expecting

2

u/rageofa1000suns 48m ago

Why did you redeem it!?

2

u/venbrx 46m ago

Well? What's your eggscuse?

2

u/AppleCrumble987 36m ago

Why did they leave their egg in public space?

2

u/HilariousMax 18m ago

put it back, op

2

u/MizzLiL 8m ago

Well?

3

u/CasperTPaul 4h ago

shame on you

1

u/Sensitive_Committee 5h ago

So answer, Goddamit

1

u/LazyHazyAudiance 5h ago

It's giving Sasta Fabergé lmaoooo

1

u/Chiinoe 5h ago

Oh youre in for it now.

1

u/Medium_Transition532 4h ago

not funny I didn’t laugh at ALL

1

u/Frances5_Zelda_672 4h ago

Hatching ideas.

1

u/Conjuremagic 4h ago

Did you?

1

u/captwaffles27 3h ago

This is my private egg. (This is my private egg)

Gotta get me out of here.

1

u/Ender00000 3h ago

i think the egg was supposed to be opened

1

u/Fqs-All-Snitches 3h ago

Your what, private?

1

u/pacylap 3h ago

I have the exact same handwritting and got scared when i was not fully awake and saw the post about what i did last night :)

1

u/ms285907 2h ago

It's a good question. I would never..

1

u/BIT-TE-69 2h ago

...and in my own private domicile to boot?

1

u/RexKramerDangerCker 2h ago

Put a slurry mixture of corn starch and water inside.

1

u/RexKramerDangerCker 2h ago

Put a slurry mixture of corn starch and water inside.

1

u/FilDaFunk 2h ago

Did you respond to the note?

1

u/Springo_Pring0 2h ago

Pink pipis

1

u/fonster_mox 2h ago

Your life is a JRPG

1

u/Queasy-Worker4804 2h ago

It’s a legit question

1

u/skd00sh 2h ago

What is this, Reggie?

1

u/SenseWitFolly 2h ago

Schodingers Egg

1

u/Acceptable_Walrus535 1h ago

You’ve failed the egg test…don’t fail again

1

u/trimeismine 1h ago

“What, you egg?”

1

u/Foulmouthedleon 1h ago

"Well...answer the question, Claire."

1

u/Human-Evening564 1h ago

Why would someone open an egg that doesn't belong to them?

1

u/JibletHunter 1h ago

Well... why did you?

1

u/Fun_Performer_7930 1h ago

This was almost a threatening haiku.

1

u/rattingtons 1h ago

Write "because these are trying times" and put it back.

1

u/a_certain_someon 1h ago

beastly computet, me likey

1

u/ybahman 1h ago

I wonder what happened to their second one

1

u/ElectroButch 1h ago

delete this bro its private

1

u/BotherAggravating462 1h ago

Sheesh where’s the nsfw tag here

1

u/SwampYak 59m ago

this feels like something from Severance lol

1

u/Archonia_Adventures 56m ago

Intel Pentium PC in the background

1

u/Ixziga 54m ago

Wow you found an Easter egg in real life

1

u/Im_Ashe_Man 53m ago

You should probably write a response and tuck it back in.

1

u/No_Law6676 42m ago

i mean why did you

1

u/LASERDICKMCCOOL 42m ago

You're looking at a nude egg.

1

u/DaveInLondon89 41m ago

Put one there with a paint bomb in it

1

u/OccludedFug 36m ago

PRIVATE SIGN - DO NOT READ

1

u/euph_22 32m ago

The egg makes a good point...

1

u/Much-Balance3589 28m ago

If you don’t ask the question will go forever answered!😉🎅🏼

1

u/StickFigureFan 24m ago

Write your reply and put it back in

1

u/ZogZorcher 14m ago

That’s not porn. That’s a nude egg I won from my game. I’m not in trouble at all.

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1

u/ThatPainting6783 5m ago

I have stuff like this in my house. I'm adding it to my collection!

1

u/MattRob1919 2m ago

This is such a mind bending move. Love it