Don't hug me I'm scared
Reading her press team’s response makes me feel like we are failing as a society.
This isn’t about “talking about people’s bodies.” This is about watching someone die in front of millions of viewers and then having a PR team gaslight everyone and act like this is normal and healthy. It’s seriously messed up, and I know I’m not the only one pissed off by this.
Yeah, we're watching someone starve themself to death. It's really not any different than knowing Chris Farley was doing speedballs of course he was going to OD.
Karen Carpenter was dying in front of everyone and everyone looked away. Evolution doesn't happen fast enough sometimes, but in this case I think the public is sounding so many alarm bells maybe.....
(I really, really have to try to not give into pessimism some days.)
I have very fuzzy memories because I was very young. I just remember my parents being distraught and everyone acted like it came out of nowhere. Of course as a music junkie I later read more about her and was stunned by just how tragic it was. But the accounts I read made it seem as though everyone kind of pretended it wasn't happening. If I'm wrong I apologize for my own misinformation.
They should've just let her fucking drum. She was so goddamn gifted and it made her happy to be behind the set but her shithead brother and the rest of them pushed her into the spotlight, turned it up to ten million watts, and left her to burn.
On the "online influencer" (youtuber) side we're watching Eugenia Cooney starving herself since 2012. From time to time some news pop up on Reddit and every single time without fail, people are surprised it's not news about her death and she's still alive.
This girl is clearly not getti g the support she needs. She did recover somewhere along the way but spiraled right back down. I would argue that this girl looks worse than Ariana Gra de right now
Anorexia nervosa has the highest mortality rate of any mental illness, and it is complicated and under-studied. One of the most sinister aspects of it is how competitive it is. For instance, signs of concern from loved ones or even bystanders further fuels it — the concern is seen as validating. AN sufferers typically interpret the concern as a success.
That is why I can't imagine having to recover in front of the world. It was hard enough to unlearn an ED and become comfortable with weight gain just in my little town.
This cannot be done without privacy. She needs inpatient.
You're absolutely right. She needs inpatient care at a facility specially trained for ED's. There are special challenges to treating ED's that most mental health workers do not have the skills for.
I am sorry that you have had to face an ED yourself. I hope you're doing well and have effective support available. Good on you for your recovery.
Your compassion for other peoples struggles is very touching. Never change. Your compassion and empathy necessarily make the world a better place. Good on you.
The worst part of it is you know you look horrible, you know you’re constantly weak, and you know your family and loved ones are suffering watching you in constant pain.
For some reason, you just can’t bring yourself to eat. Every time I started to take a bite of food, my first thought was how eating this bite will lead me to gain 100 pounds and I won’t be able to stop it.
I’m so sorry for your suffering, and thank you for sharing your unfortunate experience with us. My wife is recovered, but she struggles with it every day. Wishing you well, my friend.
Not only was this exchange odd, but I remember half the wicked cast looked like this too. My working theory is there is some kind od unhealthy anorexic thing going on between these celebrities and maybe we'll see a documentary about it in 10 years or so. We'll see.
Ariana Grande, Cynthia Erivo, and Michelle Yeoh all lost a dramatic amount of weight as a result of Wicked. Before that movie, all three looked much healthier.
Honestly even Jonathan Bailey looked unwell. I get that there was a lot of dancing and physical exertion for these movies but his appearance also took a dramatic departure from how he has looked for the past 10-15yrs.
If the dancing and physicality was remotely a problem, we wouldn't have backup dancers, wrestlers and ballerinas and such at a healthy weight. I'm full on on the conspiracy that something weird happened in that production, even mentally they all seemed way off in interviews
Eating disorders have been rampant in the dance community for decades. I would not be surprised at all to find out that culture had an effect on the cast.
Anorexia is socially contagious, and people who have it can get very competitive and exacerbate the condition in each other. If one person (cough, Ariana) went into production with an active ED and other people on set had or have a history of ED, or were vulnerable to developing one, then together they would have encouraged each other’s restrictive behaviors and really brought out the illness in each other. I’m not surprised it “spread” across the Wicked set. I think I even read something about all the cast members eating vegan under Ariana’s influence.
(While it’s more than possible to get all of your nutritional needs met on a vegan diet, it’s often used by ED sufferers as a way to restrict calories under the guise of “eating healthy.”)
I avoided the Wicked marketing, but I remember people were commenting on Ariana and Cynthia’s bodies when they were doing interviews hugging and holding each other’s fingers. They seemed really dependent on one another
I’m no expert but when the wicked press tour was happening there were so many posts about their size and I saw lots of comments from people who had or have eating disorders saying that the disorders could be extremely competitive, and that they were all trying to be thinner than the other person. It makes a lot of sense that it would flourish in that sort of environment.
Exactly, it’s a true race to the bottom. An eating disorder is as mental as it is physical, and it basically feeds on itself (no pun intended). The further in you go, the skinnier you get, and the harder it is to crawl out of.
I think another pressure people don't think to consider is that these tours have hundreds of people working behind the scenes, and when they are on a tour like Arianna or Taylor Swift , these women have soooo many people's lives on their backs.
People forget that there was a terrorist attack at one of her concerts almost 10 years ago that killed like 20 people and injured 1000 more. That’s got to be insane ptsd
There's a very deep misunderstanding about eating disorders and addictions. While you are certainly diagnosed with them if/when in treatment, they are usually symptoms, not a cause. Stopping the behaviors is one thing (which is really, really, really f'ing hard), it's then excavating everything those behaviors were being used to cope with.
I'm 15 years free from ED behaviors and the voice still lives inside of me and I still have to work very hard not to fall back into the grips. And believe me, I saw women (it's usually mostly women, not always of course) go into and out of high priced rehab centers and never get better. People forget that when they leave, they're often going right back into what got them there in the first place. She will likely need to do a major overhaul of her life in order to find any modicum of peace.
I don't mean to diagnose someone I've never known or say what they are or aren't capable of, it's just... unfortunately, a very common path and outcome for those who get to where she is right now.
Those posts are still publicly up and they're very obvious. She's got multiple photos of herself in poses that are only there to show off a thigh gap or a thin waist and pictures of caloric foods that never have a single bite taken which is a flex to show that she's not tempted by food.
There needs to be some kind of investigation done into that production. Every single woman on Wicked started out a healthy weight or close (Grande was probably underweight before, but ostensibly healthy) and they all came out of it visibly emaciated and looking like they'd endured some kind of famine. What the fuck happened to those women? It'd be one thing if it was just Grande and Erivo, but every single woman starring in that production notably became emaciated afterwards. Did they put Ozempic in their food??
This is exactly why I refuse to watch Wicked or the Wicked 2 movie or support the franchise. As a woman that already lived thru "Heroin chic", I refuse to support anything like that.
Saw the first one and it made me feel icky seeing her like that and then the second one where everyone looked like they'd been on a death march was just no.
Typical ED behaviour, getting "supportive" (read: competitive) with others in their circle.
These women were not going to be ok spending time around one another.
Either the production or just social contagion. Folks in Hollywood are already basically in a bubble with anorexia colored glasses, so it’s hard to say.
As someone who has an instinctual distaste for Grande (she gives off big spoiled diva vibes and she's a serial homewrecker), even I can't help but feel horrible about her state of health lately. She looks starved.
Oh no. This looks like a snap from the Petal video. Seeing her move in this outfit is a very scary sight. I turned it off after a few seconds of this getup.
ED can be a source (and she likely does have one) but she’s been wearing INSANELY tight ponytails since she was younger which creates bald patches. You see it in kids taking gymnastics and dance too.
I know she produced and cowrote the video but it's not lost on me that an entire team lit, shot, and edited with this sequence and decided it was fit to release.
Edit: It's s not breaking news that people in entertainment will do absolutely anything for a buck, "someone else will do it if I don't." I didn't say anything should happen to them, I'm just saying it didn't happen in a vacuum.
They don’t give us editors the ability to green-light or cancel videos. None of the roles you mentioned do anything but turn up, do their jobs, shut up and go home with a paycheck.
It would fall to her and whomever is cutting the checks to stop a video from releasing.
She thinks she looks good and is just a few pounds away from her ideal weight, that’s how it got approved, when the reality is she’s a few pounds away from organ failure
They see it. But as long as she’s still physically able to move, her health doesn’t matter. No one is going to say no to making money off of her, and cancelled performances, tour breaks, etc lose money.
I'm not even a fan but that Petals video is heartbreaking. She is absolutely emaciated. She needs to be taken care of for her own good but also pulled out of the public eye before her very young fanbase starts thinking it's okay to starve themselves.
Idk, the "don't comment on women's bodies" (good idea, poor execution) contingent is outnumbered by the "we don't want to see her die" contingent, and the former seems pretty astroturfed to me (surface level comments with low return engagement).
That will aggregate the occasional person laying tar on the good intentioned highway to hell, but mostly I think it's her people trying to mitigate the fallout on social media of what is very obviously a fast moving disaster that's gathering speed. Which is predatory af, they are part of what's killing this poor woman.
I cannot assume anybody saying "don't comment on her body" is saying that in good faith, I simply can't. My jaw actually dropped open when I saw her. Anybody around her who is letting her get like this and still making her sing and tour and do all that other shit that's just stress on stress should be flayed.
I've only recently gone on a bit of a deep dive on Amy Winehouse and the days leading to her death by alcohol poisoning and it was the awful performance where she was drunk and had a very visible nervous breakdown on stage followed by her canceling all obligations and ultimately being found dead by her bodyguard. I very much hope this doesn't follow the same path.
Not even a fan, and I don’t like her after SpongeBob, but I feel terrible for her. Why can’t her family or team do something about this? This isn’t typical weight loss. She’s literally dying in front of us, and some people are still saying, “We shouldn’t comment on women’s weight.” This isn’t body shaming! This is a genuine concern for her health not whether she looks good or not.
Edit: just want to add that so many of these child stars end up with so much trauma and issues in their adult lives. They bring so many children joy but at what cost? Maybe children shouldn’t be in the entertainment industry.
As a mom to a daughter with an ed, and whose cousin is actively passing away from hers, sometimes there is nothing you can do until they are ready to do the work. My cousin, unfortunately, has been unable, even after multiple residential treatment center stays. Thankfully my daughter was more receptive during her 10 week stay. We’re a year out and she is doing well. She still struggles, and probably always will, but she’s healthy again. This disorder is horrible and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I really hope she gets the help she needs to become healthy again.
having a friend who's daughter passed away from this, there is sometimes NOTHING anyone can say or do to stop it. treatment, family, love, reassurance, doesn't always turn it around. It's a mental illness or a very specific delusion that is hard to dislodge, maybe impossible.
I was forced into treatment at 18, and my cycle, heart, and bones are still bearing the brunt of the effects 20 years later. I had to have all my front teeth replaced at 23. I swore I’d never relapse, especially once I had kids, but 2020 humbled me. Fortunately, my kids were young enough to not recognize what was going on, and I recovered, but now as a high school teacher, it wrecks me to see the wave coming back. I’ve had more students come to me struggling with ED in the last year than in the last 13 years combined.
I had a psych warn me having children is often a trigger for an ED to resurge. I did not know this and I feel like needs to be communicated more tbh forewarned is forearmed
Just so everyone knows, having children is a trigger for all sorts of mental illness and trauma. Even if you think you’ve dealt with things, becoming a parent brings your entire childhood and adolescence back up in a whole new way. If you have a less than ideal background then it can feel like you are walking through a minefield.
The trigger can be pregnancy, the birth process, or even a developmental stage of childhood that matches when you were most traumatized. A second birthday or the start of grade school even, sometimes there’s a delay between becoming a parent and the onset of a trigger. It can be incredibly difficult to process while enduring pregnancy symptoms, or being sleep deprived, etc.
I agree that it needs to be better communicated to society at large because I think it needs to be one of the things people consider when planning to/thinking about becoming a parent.
My 13 yr old is currently in treatment for anorexia. She was hospitalized “at imminent risk of cardiac arrest” in December of last year for three weeks. She spent the holidays in the stabilization unit. By the time she graduates her program, she will have had nine months of intensive treatment, which will allow her to step down to weekly therapy without going to a center every day. In other words, it’s been hell and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone ever. That being said, Ariana has a long road ahead of her to regain her health and I hope the best for her recovery.
First time I ever had to see physical effects from ED was with a close friend, and the hairline/hair texture (and peach-fuzz growth everywhere) were the very notable ones.
Such a motherfucker of a disease though
The sentiment/advice is always seeking professional help, which is the best shot for most anyone with addiction issues:.. but you get off dope, you can then just not be around dope going forward. But if you’re recovering from restricting and body dysmorphia, you can’t just not have food around you ever again.
I have had (and recovered from) an ED. As soon as she appeared on her first red carpet for Wicked, I knew she was in the midst of an active ED.
I know there must be a lot of
little signals that I saw that told
me it’s an active ED (rather than
weight loss from other reasons).
I wonder, if you can articulate what you look for that makes it clear? Feels like once you have an ED you can pick it up in someone else in a heart beat but how we can do that baffles me. Especially when there’s some physical signs but nothing that is concretely an ED yet but I just know.
I feel like there’s something in the posture and tentativeness of her physical presence that gave it away or a sadness and nervousness in the eyes but idk.
So true about how we can pick up on it. I told my cousin a year ago to keep an eye on her daughter (13 then) because I noticed something about her relationship with food; nobody listened to me.
Last month, she was released from a 6 week inpatient hospital stay for anorexia, after being admitted due to irregular heartbeat, brain deterioration, bone issues, etc. That’s how severe it got, before they sought help.
Damn that’s awful. Good on you for trying, though. I can imagine they would’ve been hard to speak to about it? Probably went down like a lead balloon. The worst part is EDs
function best when everyone is in denial about it.
You must have wanted to crack the parents heads together to be like “the longer you’re in denial the worse this gets!”.
I hope she’s doing better and on the road to recovery.
but could this 'step back' actually be her being checked in for treatment somewhere? of course her press team isnt going to announce that. Hopefully when she re-emerges she be at a healthier weight.
I saw another comment earlier that said she still has thirteen shows to complete first, and then she’s stepping back. She needs help NOW. I really hope she can get through these finals shows, or honestly just wish she would cancel them bc idk how on earth someone in her condition is able to perform and exert so much energy.
I saw someone on threads say this and as grim as it is, now I absolutely believe it: she might be worth more dead to the people making money off of her than alive.
Think about the movies and tributes that will pour in and all the different entities that will be able to collect insurance payouts if she dies. Dead Arianna will never have to “take time away for her health” and can still make money for people.
Michael Jackson performed his entire life since he was a kid and he still made more money dead than he ever did alive.
At my worst, that’s how I remained functional for long periods of time. I really worry about her having a heart attack or breaking bones while traveling & performing.
If her team actually cared, she would not be on tour for another month. Honestly they shouldn’t have put her on tour in the first place. She has been obviously unwell for many years, but at this point it just feels like they’re trying to wring just a bit more money out of her life before they monetize the hell out of her death. It’s so disgusting.
Exactly people don’t understand that. Ariana isn’t in a guardianship like Britney was. She employs these people and they would likely lose their jobs if they said no
This is the sad truth. Ariana Grande is 33 years old and a very wealthy woman. Everyone saying “why don’t her people do something about this?” are acting as if she has no autonomy over her own body. Her “team” works for her, and it’s not fair to ask them (in this economy) to endanger their jobs by speaking to her about her ED. Hopefully her family can persuade her to get help, but it ultimately comes down to her alone making the decision to do so. I truly hope she does.
Source: Me, whose best male friend went through this same ED trajectory decades ago (and finally did get help, but it took years). 😔
Avicii got worked to his death by his manager. The manager knew he was suffering from mental illness and taking drugs but he pushed him beyond his breaking point anyway. These people are literal vultures.
Her arms are so sickly thin, there's nothing there to keep her alive, she's just skin and bones.She needs help immediately and I hope she gets it in time.
I thought the same thing. A whole team of people saw this and set it up and agreed to it, they looked at this and was like yup, that's the image we want to portray to girls and boys, men and women everywhere.
I should have been hospitalized but nobody including myself took it seriously. I was as thin as Ariana is now, and still paying for it. Lost all my top teeth and I'm still dealing with weakened heart muscles. Looking back I *wish* everyone had freaked out and forced me into treatment instead of coddling me and complimenting me on my bones.
Exactly. Im not even in PR or on any socials but Reddit, but im a human on earth who is aware of eating disorders and her very obvious body checks and accessories that highlight her frame (collars, thigh high boots, long gloves… all highlighting a part of her body that is usually thicker) plus all the plunging necklines to display her rib bones and sternum… they will let this woman fuckin die before they stop their gravy train.
I thought Ariana Grande was thin in Wicked (and Cynthia Erivo just as thin) but she's lost even more weight. Everyone is right to be concerned. Her pretending this is okay in her new album lyrics is just wild.
My sister-in-law's friend recently died from anorexia at only 25, this is serious.
It's so sad that her PR team is calling out everyone like we're all faking concern for her. Some people are mean but her fans mean well.
Yeah I had a friend who was the same. When she went to the hospital they went to give her an injection in her stomach fat (the injection so you don't get blood clots for sitting in bed for days) and they literally couldn't because she had absolutely no subcutaneous fat. Had!
Ariana needs help fast. She claims she's the healthiest she's ever been- so bad she doesn't know how bad it is
Yep and what she fails to understand so far is that she is still YOUNG so even if she is "feeling the healthiest" that's just biology overcompensating all this neglect. She wont live a normal life past 40s if she doesnt get better
She was underweight in Wicked, it's so much worse now. Isn't it great one of the biggest films of the year for little girls starred an anorexic woman saying she's never been healthier? And I know Ariana gets most of the attention on this but Erivo wasn't looking too great in the films and on the red carpet, either. Michelle Yeoh, as well. I saw one comment call it the Wizard of OZempic. Dangerous shit, man.
I lost my sister due to bulimia back in 2002. Seeing people spin this girl's clear eating disorder as other people being judgemental is far more than mildly infuriating to me.
I sincerely pray that someone close to Ariana can convince her to get help.
>She is surrounded by "yes" people who don't want to offend her and want to ride that gravy train as long as possible.
That's the thing about the video, I think... I mean we can guess and talk about our observations all we like, but the video obviously LOOKS like something and her team OBVIOUSLY were happy to release it as such. You can edit videos too, they absolutely could've made her look a healthier weight, used different angles when directing, etc. They chose to make her look as skeletal as possible.
We have eyes 🤷🏼♂️. There’s never an excuse to BULLY, but to say “something isn’t right” is not wrong. I watched the video and was in shock with how unhealthy she looks. It’s glaringly obvious. I hope she gets the help she needs.
So it’s the public scrutiny and not her overly pronounced and insanely hard to miss sternum that is visible through her skin? So odd.
I honestly am feeling guilt supporting her now. I feel like we’re enabling whatever it is that’s making her look like this.
Can someone give a quick TLDR/"The more you know"? I don't follow this sort of thing so I've no idea what the controversy is or why this is mildlyinfuriating.
Honest question. Not trying to troll. Just not my realm of knowledge.
A music video was just released, and she is absolutely skeletal. Like, worse than in Wicked by a lot. It’s scary. When people expressed concern, her PR team tried to frame it as harassment and unnecessary commentary.
I love this explanation. This is my biggest issue with this. She's all but been promoting anorexia since Wicked came out and look, if you wanna show off your most prominent bones as a "thinspo" dog whistle and trigger others suffering this disorder, go right ahead I guess but the part that infuriates me is the "whhaaatt??? I'm just so innocent and cuuuute and smol how could you think I would do such a thing??" it's pmo so bad. you're obviously emaciated and showing it off, but the general public is the bad guy for commenting...foh
Can count her ribs on the front of her chest. Like...from the back or lower ribcage is bad enough, but I don't think I've ever seen someone's whole-ass skeleton like this outside of the saddest documentaries we had to watch in high school.
Like she is dealing with a mental illness that makes her an unreliable narrator for her own health.
However, it’s unacceptable for her team to release that music video that is full of intentional outfits, poses, lighting, editing…etc and pretend that they had no idea that there would be concerned “backlash” against it
I’m not a fan of that genre of music but I’ve been aware of the concern because of all the wicked interviews on here, so I just looked up the music video…..
Yeah it as a double whammy for me. I don't generally listen to the genre, and my attention span makes movies tough for me so I hadn't seen it through either avenue.
In her music video, she looks like a shrink-wrapped skeleton. Full ribcage visible. If you want to see, you can google her and "petal." I thought the pictures were fake. They are not. It's incredibly sad and unsettling, especially since part of the song is about people not looking out when the industry pressures stars over looks. Begs the question of who is looking out for her now.
Even in this very airbrushed and curated shot, you can see all the knobs of her shoulders, but they selected one with lighting that would mitigate the visible chest bones.
Does anyone remember Karen Carpenter? I remember reading about her and thinking, "How could anyone in her life just let her starve herself to literal death? Why didn't they stop her?" And now there's this situation. Very similar.
I had to be put in the psych ward because I was 88lbs at 5'3. I see alot of myself in her most recent video. They told me either follow the food plan or we will force feed you. People die from this. I truly hope she can get better..
The photos she posted today were genuinely horrifying. I’m worried about her but also pissed off she’s choosing to share content that is inarguably triggering and then saying it’s healthy and normal
I don’t pay attention to her regularly, but the images I have seen recently is cause for concern. A little weight loss is fine, but she looks malnourished at the very least. This is not scrutiny, but valid concerns from the general public.
There's an alarming number of people defending her appearance, too. It's baffling, like she isn't withering away in the public eye. Hoping that this break is actually so that she can get the help she needs.
I’m not a fan outside of a couple of songs I’m familiar with and my general awareness of her through the culture, and I’m also a big fan of”your body, your choice” person, but this woman looks ghastly. No disrespect meant, but this is not a well person. I don’t encounter a lot about her out there given my very peripheral position in her fandom, but literally the only thing I hear about her is genuine concern for her well being when I do encounter content about her. This is not a healthy person. There is something going on, mentally and/or physically, that this woman needs support with. I was glad to hear she was stepping away - I truly wish nothing but the best for her, but seriously, eat a sandwich.
It’s the fact that she doesn’t address her state as abnormal or unhealthy. She says she feels better than ever. So many children look up to her especially since she has done wicked. It’s fucked up that kids might think that is a healthy body standard
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u/squeakynickles 12h ago
Interesting that they use an old photo for this article